Second Date

First dates are easy to come by. You go on a date and either you click or you don't. But because first dates are so easy to come by, second dates are a little harder to have.

I don't take any potential suitor seriously until we have been on a second date. But how many dates does it take for you to know if you are feeling someone?

I'm giving this internet dating thing another try because conventional dating, whatever that means, has not worked for me. I met this really nice guy and we have a lot of similar interests but our schedules, location and preferred modes of communication pose a serious challenge to getting to know each other.

I met him through a Craig's List ad and after our first date he said he would take the ad down. I advised him against that. I said you never know who you will meet and you should not put all your eggs in one basket. But after our second date he reposted his ad. Part of me wanted to be offended but a larger part of me really didn't care that deeply. But I sent him an email teasing him about his repost and I must have hit a nerve. It was like he felt guilty about posting and he went on and on about how he would like to get to know me better if I would only make the time.

He's a nice guy...a great guy...just not sure if he is great for me. We have a good time when we do hang out but I don't feel that desire to make time. You know that feeling that no matter how busy your schedule is you are going to find time to see that person. I don't have that feeling. But how do you tell someone, in a nice way, I think you are cool but I don't see this going anywhere and yet still remain cool with the person? Oh well, I guess it's back to the Craig's List ads for me.

First Speed Dating Event

My new side hustle for 2007 is hosting speed dating events around Manhattan for Cupid.com.

I held my first event on Monday at this great location called Fashion 40 Lounge. There were 27 people, 14 women and 13 guys. It was a good looking group and pretty diverse although still majority white. But everyone had a really good time and the venue was happy with the money they made from the bar. I already have 3 more events booked for the coming months with Fashion 40 so I think I'm off to a great start.

I know some of you are like why in the hell would you sign up to do something like this and what kind of people speed date? Well I'll ask the last question first. Busy professionals are the people that sign up for speed dating. They are tired of the bar/club scene and they have busy and demanding careers that doesn't leave much time to find a mate and date. So with speed dating they can meet potential dates for about the same price they would spend going seeking at a bar or club. And I'm talking good looking people with really good jobs.

So why did I decide to do it? Hosting speed dating events totally fits with my personality. And anyone who read my blog when I worked for the AJC knows dating, relationships and sex is a topic I like to talk about. Helping people meet people is right up my alley.

My first year in NYC was all about adjusting and getting settled but not really about going out and dating. Now I have a very good excuse for going out and I'm getting to know a lot of owners and managers at various venues throughout the city. I'm a people person and I get to meet so many people doing this. And even though I am hosting I have gotten hit on a few times which falls in line with me wanting to date more in 2007.

Last but definitely not least is I get to have fun and make a little money on the side. When I say little I mean I'll never be able to quit my job and do this full time. This side hustle is going to help me to achieve one of my 2007 resolutions because chump change does add up.

If I wasn't an event coordinator I would have probably attended a speed dating event just for fun. I'm pretty open to trying new things. And we all know that if what you have been doing in the past has not worked then it's time to do something different.

Anyone in NYC wants to give speed dating a try, let me know...I promise to give you a very nice discount and on some occassions I might be able to get you in for free.

Just To Get By

Excuse me y'all. I just gotta take a moment out to rant about something that is on my mind and on my heart.

I'm tired y'all...just tired. I'm tired of this race called life. Cause no matter how hard you work to get ahead it just seems like you never really get ahead.

I went to college...why...because I was always told/taught that going to college is how you become successful. And I got a degree...for what? Cause I was supposed to and they say you'll make more money. Whatever, I'll be paying student loans for as long as I'll be paying a mortgage for that degree that is supposedly going to make me successful and help me to make more money.

All my life I've been working to get ahead so I could help my family and I'm still not in a position to do that. So what's the point? Should I get on welfare and section 8 housing so I can coast through life not giving a shit. Poor and lower income folks may not have a lot but they get by...I work every day and I'm still just getting by so who really has the right plan. I'm tired of busting ass to just get by.

I don't want to be rich. By no means is obtaining large amounts of money my goal. Cause like Biggie said, more money, more problems. I have always said I just want to get to a position of comfort. So when I want to go on vacation I can just go. When my family needs some financial help, I don't even have to think twice. Where every month I'm not "figuring out" how to pay the bills.

I'm a self proclaimed hustler...don't get me wrong. Everyone, even folks with money, hustle. But when you hustling for survivial even the hustler can get tired of having to hustle. Anyone feeling me on this?

Fresh Direct

The last place anyone would ever expect to find me is a grocery store. I live around the corner from a grocery store. Walk past the grocery twice a day, every single day. But I could literally count the number of times I have actually been in that grocery store. And with Fresh Direct I don't EVER have to go grocery shopping again.

I don't know what it is about grocery stores but every time I step foot in one I feel like I'm Alice in Wonderland. I never know where anything is and even if I have a grocery list to get myself organized I'll end up going down the same aisles two or three times because I didn't realize several items on my list were in the same aisle. Whenever I have gone grocery shopping I spent HOURS in the store and bought way more than I intended to buy.

But now I buy my groceries online and life could not be better.

A year ago if someone had told me I would be buying my groceries online I would have laughed at them. I had this perception of online grocery shopping as being lazy, costly and just boogie. Why should I pay someone to get my groceries? But my perception was all wrong.

Online grocery shopping is not lazy but efficient. I just did a time management webinar today and one of the time saving tips was to buy your groceries online. You won't waste time "window" shopping and picking up unnecessary items.

Shopping online for groceries costs the same and sometimes even less. At least with Fresh Direct they have sales all the time and every week there are "President's Picks" in which the company president picks like 10-20 items to charge 50% off...I have caught specials on shrimp, crab cakes, meat, already cooked meals, etc. And delivery is only $5. So you mean all I have to do is pay someone $5 to pick up all my groceries and deliver them to my door as opposed to lugging them myself? The service alone is worth more than $5. Fresh Direct also has incentives for newbies like $25 off your first two orders. So for the last few months I have just been signing up using different email addresses so I can get the discount. The minimum order is $40. I can get $40 of food for $15 plus delivery. That sounds like free food to me and I like getting free stuff...especially food.

Now some of my friends do tease me and say that I have gotten boogie...that I think I'm too good for the grocery store. On the contrary, I'm just all about saving time because as we all know time is money. So instead of spending hours in the grocery store I could be doing something productive or heaven forbid doing something fun.

I like online grocery shopping so much I'm thinking about trying other online grocery stores like Amazon and yourgrocer.com. Now you'll have to excuse me as I have some groceries to put away.

This email was inspired by yet another delivery straight to my door from Fresh Direct.