Sunday, February 26, 2006

Birthday Wishes

I usually don't do the birthday wish list thing because why should I set myself up for disappointment if I don't get anything. Please believe I'm very appreciative of all the birthday greetings but it would be nice to get a gift on your special day...the one day and only day where it is 100% okay to be selfish and celebrate yourself.

I'm going to try and look at my wish list as a future shopping list. I can treat myself to something off of my list every now and then. Because what's the point in working if you can't enjoy what you earn sometimes.

26th Birthday Wish List

1. Trinidad Brotha here with me to celebrate (not gonna happen but I can dream can't I)

2. Video iPod (I guess it's about time I get up on the latest technology.)

3. Digital Camera (I hate taking pictures but I need to get better about I want a nice picture of me and Trinidad Brotha together so I can put it in a nice frame on my desk at work and my nightstand when I move in to my apt.)

4. Sex and the City - The Complete Series (Collector's Giftset)

5. Sex and the City Essentials (There are 4 of them and this is the low grade cheaper gift with the best of romance, lust, mr. big and breakups.)

6. The Da Vinci Code: Special Illustrated Edition (You don't know how hard it is to find this book and I want to read it before the movie comes out this summer.)

7. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Book 6) (As much as I love Harry Potter I never bought or read this book although I partially know what happens in the book.)

8. Victoria's Secret gift card (Want to complete my garden collection and would be nice to by a new panty set...I always feel so sexy in my Vicky's.)

9. FOOD (Someone please take me out to dinner...McCormick and Schmick, Cheesecake Factory, Red Lobster, Olive Garden...SOMETHING)...although I do have plans to go to dinner with my Mom at some point.

10. TIVO with recordable DVR (I'm not even sure if a TIVO with a recordable DVR exists but if it does I want's about time I start saving some of the shows I'm missing when I'm at work.)

Well that's enough wishing for today...above all else I just want to have a nice birthday. I just want it to be a good day for me and I'm going to make the best of it. Although I think there should be a rule against having to work on your birthday.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

What Lies Beneath

I am really amazed by my new hair color. Everyone thinks it's my natural color but it's so unique to me that you'll never find my color on the shelf of your local hair supply store. Illumination naturally lightens your hair color by 2 shades. The color that comes out is what is within you. So when I have kids and if they come out with my current hair color, I won't be surprised.

All this thought about my hair made me think about all the things that lie beneath the surface within each and every one of us. I'm a tough cookie on the outside because inside there are so many wounds and scars from past experiences. Sometimes I think underneath it all I'm still just that 6-year-old girl hiding under the bed crying and talking to God...asking him why is he punishing me...what did I do wrong that he took my Dad away from me.

I'm heading in to a rough month. The beginning of March is my birthday...but the end of March marks the anniversary of my father's death. TWENTY YEARS...I can't even believe it has been TWENTY YEARS. My dad was so sick and he knew it. He once told my mom he knew he wouldn't live to see his daughter grow up. I told her well then he should have never had me. My mom got so upset with me for saying that. But if I knew I was going to die I wouldn't bring another life in to this world. Because after experiencing growing up without my father I would never want the majority of my children's lives to be spent without me here to guide them and watch them grow.

There is a huge gap in my life from losing my father so young. Some days I'm better at hiding just how big of a gap it is...but today doesn't seem to be one of those days.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

The New Mia

I mentioned last entry that I was in a makeover phase.

First I got a new job. Moved to a new city. Found a brand new apt. Got me a man (and he's so cute). And I have been working on my external self.

I now have gel nails even though I have been a die hard about keeping my fingers and toes natural. But UV gel nails do look natural, I have them cut short and they are a lot less harsh on my nail bed than acrylic nails.

I went to a spa a few weeks ago for a facial and waxing. I hadn't had that done since my girlfriend's wedding like 2 years ago. So I have made a mental note to myself to do a better job of taking care of my skin and going to get waxed regularly so it won't hurt like hell when I go.

I went on a semi-shopping spree with my mom when I got my first paycheck. I was trying to upgrade my wardrobe to look a little more professional and a lot more NYC. But that was kind of pointless because I could literally wear pajamas to work and no one would give a dayum. I work in sports and sit in front of a computer for 8+ need to look fashionable. But I do try to look nicer than normal at the weekly staff meeting.

Actually dating Trinidad Brotha has been a huge part of the new Mia. He has helped me to get over some of my rules and to seriously rethink my logic on dating and relationships. I can't say it has been easy. But it has been a learning experience for the both of us and we are growing and learning together.

The last thing to change was my hair. I was going through a braid phase when I left Georgia. Bad idea. Those braids ripped up my hair. As my stylist put it, my ends looked like they had been walked on. So I got my hair cut and colored. I love the color... I hate the cut. So I'm trying to figure out what do with my hair.

I've already made an appointment for a spanish curly weave before Trinidad Brotha gets back. He says to not get that done before he can see this hair I keep complaining about. He also suggested that maybe I should lock my hair. Now I have been giving some thought to that for quite a few years....actually since I first started going natural five years ago. I like being able to twist my hair but when I want it straight I can straighten it. I don't know if I can make the commitment to locs. I can see myself doing that after I get married but given that marriage is like some distant pie-in-the-sky thing I don't think locs are going to happen any time soon.

As much as I work on my outside I can't say there is much for me to work on, on the inside. I love me, inside and out. But I will say, no matter how much I improve on myself my addiction for movies will never die. And my man is accepting of my one obsession/compulsion/addiction so I guess it's all good.

I'm always open to suggestion because I am by no means perfect. So if you think there is something I need to work on externally or internally, let me know.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

My Thoughtful Valentine

This was almost the best Valentine's Day ever. The only thing that would have made it better if my funny valentine was actually here :(

For Valentine's Day I bought Trinidad Brotha Alicia Keys Unplugged CD. That's the only woman he is allowed to love more than me ;) But his computer doesn't have a CD drive so I bought him a portable CD player and the batteries. And of course I put a card with a very heart felt message. Don't ask cause I'm not telling you what I wrote. That is a special and private, personal message for him. I FedEx-ed it to him in Italy and it arrived right on time. After he got in from a long day on the mountain, my present was waiting for him.

One day we were in Sams Club (one of his favorite stores) and I was randomly running my mouth like I usually do. I started searching Sams Club for Rosa Regale, my favorite sparkling wine, thanks to the advice of the cultured wino. And I mentioned that it goes well with strawberries and chocolate, as I also learned from the cultured wino.

Well his ass was actually listening and paying attention to my random ramblings. He went on the internet, found and researched my drink, (he researched it to make sure that it does actually go with chocolates and strawberries), had his boy deliver a bottle of it with Godiva chocolate covered strawberries to my job.

I wish I wasn't so busy that I could actually go home, take a long hot bubble bath and enjoy my chocolate covered strawberries and Rosa Regale as I watch a DVD. That would make for an almost perfect Valentine's evening. But instead I'll give my baby a wake-up call. Tell him how much I love him again and head to my momma's house to crash...but not for long, because tomorrow the rest of my makeover/transformation continues...more on that later.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Breaking All the Rules

The fact that I am head over heels for Trinidad Brotha goes to show that rules are made to be broken. As my bloggers have always told me I need to loosen up on my rules and I have slightly and I am so glad that I did.

Rule #1 : Do not date another journalist
After my experience dating Hurricane I just didn't want to date another person in the industry because there is only like two degrees of separation in journalism so everyone knows everyone or knows someone who knows someone else.

Rule #2: Do not date a co-worker
Trinidad Brotha not only works for the same company but we work in the same department, Sports. It's cool now because we work in separate buildings and I don't foresee it being a problem when we move in to the new building next year.

Rule #3: Do not date another member of NABJ
This rule should be amended to don't date another high profile person in the organization. I can't hate on NABJ because I wouldn't have met Trinidad Brotha almost 5 years ago if it wasn't for an NABJ convention. I just don't want him to be overly scrutinized by people that knew me when I was with Hurricane. It has been three years and all parties involved have moved on.

Rule #4: Do not date someone younger than yourself.
Trinidad Brotha is three years younger than me and in some ways his youth is obvious but for the most part he is a hell of a lot mature than guys that I have dated that were older than myself. I mean he didn't get to where he is professionally by acting like he's in romper room. His youth is an advantage in that he is not as experienced or jaded as I am in terms of dating and relationships so he gives me a fresh perspective and has renewed my hope in dating and relationships.

Rule #5: Do not date guys with hair longer than yours.
This is a completely superficial rule but he has these long, soft, sexy locks that I love running my fingers threw. He takes extremely good care of his hair and I love how they smell.

Rule #6: Do not date guys from the Caribbean or Africa
It's a well known stereotype that Caribbean and African men can be domineering and have serious attitude issues. But Trinidad Brotha has just enough attitude to keep my New Jersey Drive in check.

In some ways Trinidad Brotha has showed me that some of my rules are just stupid. I was using them as a guideline but he has slipped under the radar and captured my heart.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

First Snow

Silly of me to think that I could get through my first winter back up north and not have to deal with any snow.

It started to snow Saturday night but initially it did not stick to the ground. But by the time I got off of work at 3 a.m. Sunday morning the snow was coming down steadily and sticking.

So I woke up Sunday morning to a white, winter wonderland. Snow is okay if you don't have to shovel it, dig your car out of it or walk long distances in it. My older nephew was nice enough to walk down from his apartment to shovel the ground for my mom and clean off her car and mine. Mommy, being the great mom and grandmother that she is, rewarded him with some homemade chicken soup that she prepared as he was doing all that shoveling.

I had a spa appointment set for 10 a.m. I made the appointment days ago not knowing snow was in the forecast. I know it's winter and I usually don't shave but at the request of Trinidad Brotha I was gonna get the works...lower legs, underarms and brazilian bikini. And I have been so stressed lately that I was also going to treat myself to a facial. I have been working every day straight, no days off, since the Super Bowl because right after the SB, the Olympics started. So my life right now is work, go home, maybe watch a dvd and sleep, when I get up it's time to go to work again.

I tried calling the spa at 9:30 and 9:45 to see if they were going to be I assumed they were not going to open when I did not get an answer and when they didn't call me back. But Trinidad Brotha was persistant...he called at 10:24 and told me to try calling them one more time. He said, "Baby, I don't mind hair down there but you need to get your underarms done." That's why I like him...gotta respect his honesty. To please him I did call the spa again...and dammit they were open. So at 10:30 I was out and trudging through the snow.

By no means was I prepared for the snow. I'm staying at Trinidad Brotha's apt and I didn't bring a lot of clothes with me. At one point I was leaving clothes at his house but we were having problems. I think dating each other and living with each other was getting to be too much so I returned to splitting my time between my mom's house and his place to avoid conflict. But today I was regretting that move. I had no boots...only my Timberland SNEAKERS...and I'm not even sure if I have boots at my mom's house or if they are in storage in Atlanta. I found a pair of his sweatpants to put on over my jeans so my jeans would not get soaking wet in the snow. I did have my big leather with fur lined jacket and the scarf and gloves my mother gave me when I moved back home since living in the south I was no longer properly prepared for facing the winter weather up north.

Luckily I only had to walk two blocks to get to the underground subway tunnel. I hopped on the train and 2 stops later I was at Central Park. People were in the park having snow ball fights, making snow angels, skiing...yes skiing, snowboarding and riding tobbagins. I had never seen people actually ski through the streets of New York so that was a sight to see.

I had to walk 4 blocks with the wind blowing the snow in my face. And I was mad when I got within one block of the spa and saw there were several subway lines I could have taken that were closer to the spa and I wouldn't have had to walk through the snow so much.

As a woman I still don't understand why we put ourselves through so much pain for the sake of beauty. I can handle getting my legs and underarms waxed but the brazilian bikini wax is torture from start to finish. My specialist Poline (pronounced Pauline) is Russian and she offered to shape my landing strip in the shape of a heart but I said no thanks, maybe next time. And facials are painful too...but only when they get to the deep pore cleaning portion of the treatment. So after all this pampering, if that's what you want to call it I had to face the wind and the snow again.

By the late afternoon the snow finally stopped but about 2 feet of the white stuff had accumulated on the ground. Walking is treacherous and tomorrow, when some of the snow freezes in to ice, it will be deadly. I might have to stop past Modell's on the way to work and pick up a pair of boots.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Half-way there

Right now I'm "half-way there" on several things in my life.

I signed a lease today so I'm half-way not homeless. But I can't move in until March 10, at the earliest. I'll probably have the movers come on March 13. Shout out to Hurricane for giving the Mia Homeless Fund a loan. Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad people can come to the rescue at the oddest times...just goes to show that good people some times make very bad decisions. I think Hurricane is still trying to redeem himself for how fucked up he was to me.

I've been dating the Trinidad Brotha so I'm half-way in a relationship. If his ass wasn't in Europe for the next five weeks we might have made it official. Now it's a matter of waiting and seeing. Will the five weeks hurt us or help us?

I say all this to say that I probably won't be settled in NYC until April or so. That's a damn shame that it's gonna take me 4 months to get settled here and even then I proably still won't be completely settled.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Tax Season

It's that time of year...the dreaded tax season. Well tax season does not have to be a drag if you get the right person to handle it for you. So here is my plug for my Tax Man/accountant Shawn Miller.

As some of y'all may know Shawn and I have gone at it from time to time but personal differences aside the man is on point about tax preparation. When I had to pay taxes last year I knew it was time to seek professional help. It is February 2 and Shawn has already filed my taxes. He pays attention to detail and tries to get you as many deductions as you can possibly qualify for. He's even given me some tips and ideas for how to get ready for the 2006 tax season and start getting my paperwork in order now so I can have all the necessary receipts and documentation.

And the best part of all he only charges $89...that's right...$89. You will not find a better tax service that will give you the high quality work and attention for that cheap. So screw H&R Block...don't go to Jackson Hewitt...hit up Shawn Miller at Financial Freedom Tax Group and support black business.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Almost not homeless

So after waiting 12 days...almost 2 weeks...I finally get the good news. I was approved for the apartment I applied for and I will move in Monday March 13...maybe.

See there is still this ever so slight problem. I need to come up with $4,785 like yesterday in order to sign the lease. That's the broker's fee, security deposit and first month's rent. NYTD has still not given me my moving money and today my new tenant is supposed to pay her rent.

So I need everything to fall in to place ASAP so I can get all these certified checks and sign on the dotted line. I'm taking donations if anyone wants to contribute to the Mia Homeless Mia get a home.

As far as why I have to wait another month to move in is my unit is in the process of being gutted and renovated. The unit will have brand new everything from hardwood floors to a new kitchen and bathroom. The reason I was interested in the place was because I knew it would be brand new and no one will have used the bathroom or any of the appliances before me. You can check Lenox Terrace out for yourselves. The place does actually look like the pictures. When I checked out the place I spent 2 hours at the complex. I looked at the model, I looked at the potential apts I could have gotten in their gutted form and I looked at units that were in the middle of renovation or just completed within the last week or two before I applied. I talked to the construction workers and the doorman so I got the complete 411 on the place. I even talked to a resident who is also a young, female, black professional and she had nothing but good things to say about the place.

Wish me luck in my endeavor to raise the funds. Something has got to come through. Maybe I should play the lottery today since I am feeling lucky :)