Role Reversal

My Mom turns 70 this year. You would think she would be retired. Not my Mom. She has collected social security and still worked 40 hours a week. But a few weeks ago she was laid off from her job and we are now in an interesting transition.

My Mom said she was already prepared for a layoff. She saw that work was slowing down and she realized that being older would qualify her to be expendable. At first I was tempted to sue her former employer for age discrimination but given who he laid off at the same time as my Mom I can't prove it.

Me being ME I immediately jumped in to driver mode. Within hours of my Mom telling me she got laid off I had stayed up all night researching stuff on the internet for her basic concerns. Can she collect unemployment and social security? She has Medicare but needs a prescription plan, which one is the best for her? Are there training programs for older adults? What jobs are there for senior citizens that still want to work? What's her credit score and how much debt does she have? What kind of debt consolidation/debt management plan could I come up with for her? I went to work the next day and created a binder of anything and everything I could find that would help her in her situation. Within 24 hours of being laid off the binder was completed. Within 48 hours of her being laid off I signed her up for unemployment and gave her the binder with ASSIGNMENTS. Yes, my crazy ass gave my Mom assignments of what she specifically had to do and when.

I blog about a lot of things and I'm sure some of you are wondering why I waited so long to blog about this but it's because my Mom and I had to adjust to our new roles. What new role is that? I have become the parent and my Mom has become the child. Not to say my Mom isn't still independent but we are definitely at a point where my Mom has to listen and do what I say and that has been very hard for her. So over the course of the year I'll be talking about this role reversal.

I've known for years because my siblings always made it clear that as the youngest our Mother would be my responsibility. And I resented that. I feel like it falls to me because I'm single, no kids and I'm the youngest. But I really feel it should be a shared responsibility. Luckily my Mom is healthy so I don't have to physically take care of her but in terms of her financial future I really do feel it's in my hands.

Anyone else in this situation where you have become the parent to your parent? For those who aren't yet, how are you preparing for your future and the future of your parent(s)?